Where to Find Love?

May 10, 2024

A human being is a system composed of the physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional subsystems. Change impacts each subsystem with different intensity depending on what the change is. This causes disintegration. When we go through a divorce, lose our employment, or experience some other stress, we feel that we are falling apart and we seek reintegration, love, and the ultimate integration.

Where to find it?

One cannot buy love because it cannot be sold. The one selling it must suppress feelings to be able to provide it to many clients. Without genuine feelings, the experience is mechanistic, only physical, the heart is left demanding and those selling it often get violated by their clients.

How does one find love if it cannot be bought?

Meditation master, Chariji, says love is a muscle. The more you experience it, the stronger it becomes. Now the question arises, how should it be experienced?

Love is contagious when it is unconditional. When we expect a return, love is a manipulative vehicle to get something. It will just be experienced and at best forgotten.
 
To find love, to follow Master Chariji’s advice,   start the experience and love unconditionally. For that, however,  you have to be loving yourself first. You can not give something you do not have.
 
What causes a lack of self-love, and self-appreciation, is the abundance of self-criticism. When you accept yourself, in spite of all your deficiencies, loving oneself starts, and loving others can happen. And when it is unconditional, without expectations, it is contagious.

So where is love?
In you.
If you let it grow.

Written by
Dr. Ichak Adizes